Life Hack

Instant Color

So if you're like me you have spent plenty of time living in an apartment; one in college, one post college, one with the person you're dating, another with the first long term relationship and then eventually your spouse. (I'm not going to say that you would live with your family in an apartment cause that just reminds me of how bad the LA market can be and how I will die in a rent controlled apartment in a sketchy part of town)

And I am blame these guys for this LA housing market

                                                    Thanks for nothing Bravo--ugh

So when you're living in an apartment it can be hard to make it feel like home so you end up buying Ikea because it is cheap and it looks like every other apartment you're in for the next 5 years whether it is yours, yours friends, or that one bad night you went home with the bar back from the Power House.

                                                                  RIP Power House

And while you can't necessarily avoid Ikea furniture when you're starting out--what you can do is something to help out with your boring and neutral colored walls to give the illusion of paint/texture/wall paper. It's super easier to do--you take that simple bookshelf from Ikea, Target or Goodwill and place them on the focus wall in whatever room you'd like to spruce up.

Focus wall: the primary wall you see in a space either from the doorway entering the room or the wall you see the most of from your primary piece of furniture AKA bed, sofa or kitchen table

Once you have placed the bookshelf you have a couple different choices you can make--you can either use a solid paint color, reusable wallpaper or traditional wallpaper (though this is the most expensive and least easy to change down the road.) You then paint/paper/stencil the inside back of the bookshelf--sans shelves-with whatever you like before you place anything in them.

It goes from this:

                                                          Yes we own a lot of Simpsons

To this:

                                                           But we are still super gay

If you use more than one bookshelf and place posters or art around them in the same color scheme it helps to trick your eye into thinking you have a painted and more colorful space. It's the type of project that can take only a day or two to do but will have a big impact--making it more personal without effecting the security deposit down the road. It will also get you lots of compliments and adds a certain level of sophistication to your space. It's a win/win.

So try refreshing your rented space with this simple trick--I find that more time you spend making a truly personalized space the more relaxing, friendly and unique you will feel about your home. And it's really those little things that make life extra special.

Quote of the Day

Quote of the Day

"You'll look back at photos of yourself and recall (in a way you can't really grasp now) how fabulous you really looked" --Mary Schmich

This is one of those quotes that has always stuck with me--this idea that one day I will realize all the time and energy, bitching and moaning, dieting and crazy exercising was all one big waste of my energy and my time. That I was never as fat or awkward or pale or ugly that I thought I was and that I would realize how much better I was than I thought and how much more fun I could have had if I had taken that pressure off of myself.

I'm starting to get to that place in y head where I just stop being so hard on myself.

But it is hard when you have spent half your life fighting an eating disorder and the other half pretending that you finally put all the hangups that got you there far away. It took me a long time to throw out my scale, embrace exercise for how it makes me feel instead of a means to an end and now sometimes when the moon is just right I can see that it wasn't ever that bad and it might even be kind of good to be me. And I think the quote helps me try and put things in perspective--though it might be seen as counterproductive that one of my most inspiring quotes is from a late 90s pop night


Ugh ugh ugh ugh

Inspiration Monday

"The Eye Has To Travel"



Every so often there is a book, film, song or painting that inspires me so much that I feel the need to share it with all of my friends--this documentry is one of them. Diana Vreeland is considered the mother of the modern fashion magazine and some might even argue the mother of the modern fashion culture. When she was the editor of Vogue magazine she changed the way the fashion world worked by creating not only the world of editorial fashion but the idea that clothes were more than just something you threw on your back but instead an insight to world culture, personal beliefs and induviduality. She wasn't about what you should wear but how you should build a sense of style from not only your clothes but your manners, philosophy and world view. She makes Anna Wintour look like a ninny

Anna is NOT happy

And this documentary is not just a celebration of Vreeland's accomplishments--though she was one of the first to take the fashion spread on location, celebrated and created a little crazy called the bikini and gave us the Met Ball where fashion mixed with history, politics and Hollywood... It is an exploration into a mind that was fascinated by the human experience both personal and universal and how that tied into our shared experience. Few people can have such a ripple effect in history and serve as an inspiration to so many still today.

And while it might seem a simple film about fashion cannot be a serious exploration of what it means to be creative, there is a twist in the film that gives us the gift of her story; a idea about creativity and personal expression that I found to be quite inspiring. And even though Vogue might not be the cultural zeitgeist it once was--Vreeland's zest for life and her quest to find the simplest of meaning is still interesting and profound.

This shit would not fly in her house

My Me Moment

I found a new friend this morning in the parking lot...

Not sure where he came from but he's now my new favorite co-worker!!!

My Me Moment

My fans love to stalk me... This picture just makes me laugh!!!

Friday Jams

Fancy by Iggy Azalea

I have a complicated history with this song--I mean if you close your eyes it sounds EXACTLY like something Gwen Stefani and Eve would have recorded years ago. It's not that I don't like it but it doesn't feel truly original. And then I saw the video which made me love the song

See if you can figure out why



It's just such a total Baldwin!

My Me Moment

June Gloom

There's this weird weather that happens in LA at the beginning of summer-this thick haze that hangs over the morning sky that always reminds me of early fall on Nantucket growing up. It's chilly and cloudy and makes me inclined to put on a thick cable knit sweater and drink hot chocolate

But it's a trap.

I honestly believe June Gloom exists simply to make us put on more layers of clothes and start stews in crock-pots so that when it hits 95 by 11 am you have no choice but to suffer. It's California's way of tricking you into believing there is seasons and it's pretty fucking convincing 

The summer here is a cruel one indeed. 

My Me Moment

The type of gang I would belong to... Turbans and fringe for all 

Life Hack

I Don't Know Much Science But....

One of things I learned from living with 10 plus roommates (not all at the same time--it was the Dollhouse, not the Frat House) is that the bathroom can become one of the most complicated places in the home--especially if you share the same social life... And even though now it is just me and the husbear--we still have to duck and dodge around each other when it comes to the morning routine--and here is my favorite weapon in that arsenal.

Did you know that you can use a small amount of this old school shaving cream on your mirror and keep it from foggy up from multiple showers? I don't claim to understand the science but it really does the trick when you have to shave, do makeup or just get dressed in a hurry--no time to wait for the room to defog. It's probably my best grooming secret and can be a huge help when on the go!


You're welcome

Truths Thursday

Down With Irony

When it came time to try and relaunch my blog, I really wanted to sit down and rethink exactly what type of theme or idea I would have with the new page. It's not like I think the blog will make me famous or even infamous-I just wanted to create something I loved that combined my passion for fashion, art, music, social issues and a confessional aspect to it. And one of things I really thought about was how to make it genuine and authentic--I really wanted it to be positive and funny and maybe be something that could brighten some one's day. I wanted it to be a way to share myself and hopefully inspire others to do the same. At times the previous blog felt like it became too biting and shallow and a bit too ironic.

I've come to hate the idea of irony.


(Don't worry Alanis--your song is still fine with me)

The thing is I've come to find the idea of irony-or like/loving things in an ironic way-to be a bit of a cop out. Now the word has come to be something different than it's actual meaning (See above for example number 1) and it is very popular to voice your opinion on things this way. People love Pabst beer ironically because it so bad it's good, watch things like "Flowers in the Attic" and "Sharkando" because the acting is terrible or the CGI poorly done, and it's a badge of honor to have those type of ridiculous passions.

But loving things ironically gives you an automatic disclaimer--like if someone else points out why you shouldn't like a thing or how foolish a TV show is you can just distance yourself from your original opinion but making it seem like "yeah-it's terrible and I know it's terrible so I don't really think (blank) is great and all I really like is "Breaking Bad" and handcrafted home brewed beer." This love of the idea of irony has become a safety net that allows you to have "out" and takes away the responsibility of owning up to your own taste and interests leading people to always be able defer to the group consensus.

And that makes me sad because one of things I think is great about people, friendships, and being social is the idea of being able to share experiences and passions, being able to say what you love and share that love with others, passing along genuine ideas, art and discourse. Instead now everything can be cut down with an ironic joke or gesture.



I guess what I'm saying is that irony has taken the place of passion when it comes to how people feel about this, we don't celebrate what we love but instead keep it at a distance as though it might hurt if it comes too close. It's a shame because there is nothing bad about loving things that aren't perfect--whether it's ABC Family shows about teenage girls being stalked via text, pop songs about foolish things that have just really great beats, or movies about stupid things with great lines or books with really bad silly plots but characters that make you happy.

        (Even Zac Efron thought Vanessa Hudgins's "Sneakernight" was a good song)

At the end of the bad loving bad things isn't the end of the world--because there is obviously something about it that you genuinely care for. Maybe you like the outrageous prose in a Steven King novel or the phat beats in a Flow Rida song--it's okay to find the bits and pieces of things to enjoy in the midst of the sub par. In a way that is what life is, special moments, people, and ideas that are surrounded by the mundane or dull--it's learning how to find and appreciate the positive that gives life meaning.

That's not to say you can point and laugh at the bad things you had along the way--I still look at certain things in my life and groan but with a slight smile. We all have to sometime's own up to our bad taste in things but we shouldn't always have a default status on everything we like so we can be cool or disavow ourselves.

I mean--I'm cool there is a website possibly devoted to all my previous bad dating choices

                                            Dating Life Pre-Johnno or Bad Idea Jeans Central
 

My Me Moment

Zenory

This is me just relaxing in the pool at Camp Bradley... Somehow Edie took the first picture without my knowing what was going on since obviously I would not normally be posing in a bathing suit for anyone but yet.. I love how calm, relaxed and zen I look here. This is not something I am normally good at but something I should really work on. It makes all the difference in the world when you're able to just recharge and escape

You Got To Start Somewhere

Why Hello There Stranger

So I'm back.

It should be a bit more dramatic than that--after all it's been over a year and 2 months since I actually posted here. I could give a million excuses--I finally married my husband Johnno, I moved out of my home of 16 years--aka the Dollhouse--and into a home for just me and the man--aka the Clubhouse. There was a lot of other things that happened around me as well--a promotion at work, friends having babies, dealing with my family issues, trying to drop another 20 pounds but...

I got lazy.

I reached a point with the blog that I found myself either unable or unwilling to share myself here. I think part of it was with all the turmoil in my life I didn't know how to string my sentences together in any way that would be helpful or necessary--which meant it was time to walk away from the keyboard and handle my life. It was a hard but correct choice to go off the grid and get my house in order--plus it allowed me time to re-think what I really wanted this blog to be going forward.

That was a hard one.

So going forward this blog is going to be a combination of male fashion, inspirational ideas and projects, lifestyle advice mixed in with pop culture, sex and a commitment to trying to change my life and hopefully do some good along the way. It's going to be honest, hopefully and even more hopeful.

So I guess that's my promise to you... And if you have questions, ideas or smack talk then please comment away--I promise to give back what you deserve.

Let's do this

BOOK WHORE

BOOK WHORE

It's Raining Men by Naomi Rand

I grabbed this novel because of the title and how campy it would be to have... Its been a long time since I have read a modern day mystery and this book would not drive me back to that habit.

There is nothing wrong with the novel--it's part of a series and the lead character of Emma Price is enjoyable to an extent, the idea of including her children in the story adds a sense of realism and makes her different from other detectives but I found her POV kind of lacking.

The main mystery did little for me--though the fact that it was her friend as the victim and her a possible second target--because I felt the story didn't really add up by the end of the day. I was confused by two characters who were very similar in their use in the story, didn't see how the facts added up the way the story claimed and just found it all to be very stunted and forced.

It's sad because I think I would have liked the novel if the story had just been a bit more polished but it is what it is.

3 stars for an interesting character as the lead but the rest lost me.

How I Want To Live

Goals Goals Goals

So I wrote awhile back about how Johnno and I were going to work on goals of being more social, getting out more away from the Dollhouse and the bar scene... Just try to develop more socially and within our relationship as well--a lofty goal.

We spent Friday night out at a bar for our friend's birthday--somewhere new and the first time the whole gang had been together in awhile. We had fun catching up with people, drinks were shared and for the most part a pleasant evening. But when we came home both Johnno and I talked about how we felt disconnected at points--I know for me it has to do with the social anxiety that comes from not smoking--which rubbed off on him.

This led to us both talking about want to work on the social life more--trying again to do more than just work, work out, drink at bars then repeat the cycle. There is not wrong with most of these things but we need to add something more to the mix.

Which led to one of the best weekends in a long time...

We spent it thrift shopping and dropping off clothes to donate, a nice simple vegan dinner out just us, a bit of catching up over cocktails at our local gay bar.... We spent Sunday out at the LA Festival of Books just seeing what people put out, we held hands in the park listening to poetry, wander the tables to see what new things were out for writers... We spend the remainder of the night at Dominic's house for dinner with a small handful of people--people who I hadn't spent much time with lately and was eager to catch up with... It was nice to have the small moments and build up new memories.

I think that has been my concern--that things have been blending together recently and I am trying to work more on being special... Within myself and my relationships with other people. It's a bit of effort but very much worth it!!!

The Number Escapes Me

Two Plus Weeks

So I fell off the non-smoking wagon a bit back due to various reasons but the biggest being I didn't really want to quit so I just made excuses... Lots of excuses... But now I am finally on track and feeling so proud of myself--I think the fake cigarette helps with the social anxiety aspect while the patches keep the cravings for nicotine away....

But the biggest part that has helped me with this is my job. Oddly enough I started to realize that who I was becoming during detox from the nicotine--the moody, mean, and messy bitch--was so similar to the people I watch for my show. Junkies coming off heroin, all that pain and misery, who then go back to using and put themselves through the cycle again... Which only hurts the people they love, makes they sick and wastes everyone's time.

I was doing the same thing

And once I realized that I was putting Johnno, my co-workers and sometimes my roommates through that cycle I made the decision to stop. To stop hurting them and myself by doing the same thing when I know I am smart enough to change.

Which really did change everything. Guess it is true what they say--you cannot quit until ready.

General Nerdom

50 Years and Still Kicking It

So "General Hospital" just celebrated 50 years on the air--50 years is a long time and one they filled with some of my favorite moments ever... Television moments like Dawn and Decker solving the carousel murder mystery and falling in love,  Sonny/Brenda/Jax triangle which was all about passion versus love/security versus danger, Dominique's brave battle with cancer while Lucy carried her baby as a friend, Gia the black supermodel and face of Deception, Jason and Robin in love and fighting the mob and AIDS, and sweet poor murdered Georgie Jones...

Some great stuff there--but this doesn't include my favorite moment in the show's history... BJ's death and Maxie gets her heart.... I cannot begin to explain how much the story of one child's death and the gift of organ donation effected me as a child. I swear that is how I became a donor card member myself. And watching the fallout from the story--from Tony and Bobbie losing BJ, to Felicia's breakdown at her niece's death which would allow her daughter to live, from Mac bravely tracking down Frisco and even sweet Lucas sending balloons up to heaven...

It still makes me teary

Obviously I love this show. So I was beyond excited when Joy told me the cast would be doing a panel at the Paley Center of Television... We quickly rounded up Valeska and decided we would all make a day of it--and it was amazing. we were able to be in a room with various cast members from Luke & Laura, Anna, Maxie, Carly, Sonny and others--totally worth the adventure and with plenty of pictures.

Here was the panel--it really doesn't capture how close we were to the stage but we able to see the scary plastic surgery of some of the cast--which wasn't as much as you would think. They were very fun and gracious with all the crazy fans even during the weird Q&A. And no--we did not ask any questions simply because I think we were more amused by how they were handling the crazies themselves

Afterwards the cast took pictures with the audience

which was really cool but rather odd... But the best was that we were able to get a super nerdier moment with Laura (AKA Genie Francis) real life husband. You might say this was the Number 1 part

Yes--the one and only Riker from Star Trek: Next Generation was there to support his wife. I think we surprised him by recognizing him but he was quite sweet and allow a picture or two to happen during the end of the Q&A. Of course the phrase Number One would continue to come into effect

I really had to pee during the Q&A and hustled down to the mens bathroom after we finished with the panel... Turns out this is the best place to go for this type of thing. I was using the urinal when I suddenly realized I was not alone--and I knew this person.

 

That's right... I peed next to Luke Spencer--the biggest name in male soap characters of all time. And no I did not look or even say much more than hello... I figured that would be pushing it--but I was in shock the whole time.

It was an amazing evening and I owe the whole thing (and these pictures) to my friends Joy and Valeska... What a great evening...

(What made it better though was when we came back past the theater a few hours later, saw the actress who played Carly still stuck outside of the Paley Center which was long closed... I think we might have freaked her out by saying hello...and then we were able to meet the head writer of the show and his assistant..... They even honked and waved to us as they left which made it more surreal)

Amazing

BOOK WHORE

BOOK WHORE
Baby Be-Bop by Francesca Lia Block

Francesca Lia Block is one of my favorite writers of all time--not just as a young adult or children's author but of all genres. She write in a style that is thickly descriptive, flavored for all of the sense and filled with a sense of innocence with darkness of reality twisted in.

It was actually with Block how I figured out why I liked the young adult genre so much--when it comes to most "adult" novels--outside the genres of romance or horror or mystery--there is a world weariness that usually drapes over the characters. The idea of hope and the art of questioning has usually left the story whereas even with the darkest young adult novel there is a sense of hope or idea of time to come and change things. That's something I definitely lock into.

That said--Baby Be-Bop is the 5th book in the Weetzie Bat series but could simply stand on it's own two feet as a single novel. It tells the story Dirk McDonald growing up in a timeless--though 80s in the series timeline--Los Angeles and figuring out who he is, what he wants and how it fits into the history of his family. There are touches of magic and the punk rock scene, dark thoughts and history played off the magic of first love and desire and something very adult in how this is all pursued.

It is the type of book I wish I could write because it blends so much in with such little effort. It seems like a simple story with a simple goal but it is more about the world and becoming an adult than one would imagine.

Four stars

Just Being Rory

Just Putting You On Notice

 

 

 

 

Seriously people--its how I live... And I am making this face in the back of my head constantly!

BOOK WHORE

BOOK WHORE

A Fool for Love--a Biography of F Scott Fitzgerald by Scott Donaldson

I have always been a little obsessed with F Scott Fitzgerald and stumbled across this book while searching out titles for the upcoming wedding. I wasn't sure how dry the biography would be but figured I would at least give it a shot--well worth the effort.
The story is not broken down in a traditional time frame but rather by the spheres of influence in Fitzgerald's life. Sure it begins with childhood and family but also explores the importance of Princeton University and how that shaped him, how his various love interests reflected on his psyche and defined his characters, his love/hate relationship with social status as well as life long struggle with alcohol.
Of course it also spends time on Zelda and their relationship together and apart but also sends a suitable amount of time on his daughter Scottie and how his flaws and favors pressed down upon her as well. It also spends time really talking about his life in Hollywood which is something that seems to be forgotten by most followers.
Smart, clean, in-depth and overreaching at points--much like the man himself. Worth the effort to track this down if you enjoy his books.

Four stars

BOOK WHORE

BOOK WHORE

To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee

"I recently reread this book just because and totally remembered what was so amazing about the story. Harper Lee uses a slight dialogue and prose style to create a truly classic American story about small town life, the ideals and cost of justice and what it means to belong with in society--as a neighbor, a sibling, and a friend. I know this is required reading in most schools but is worth revisiting as an adult to see what an economy of words can do and how even a simple story focused on children can teach adults about the world."

Five stars