Sunday, July 15, 2012

The Power of No

I recently came to notice how much I use the word no... I was flying back from a wedding and thinking about my life and how I handle things--how negative I can be--and how I want to change that... Part of it is how quickly I negate things--no I dont eat that, no I dont want to wear that, no I dont have the time to write, no I dont want to try that...

Its a bigger list than that.

So I'm trying to find a way to turn things to the positive... Instead of I dont eat burgers--I choose to eat portbella mushrooms grilled instead--I choose to wear my hippy goofy clothes instead of hating on black pieces and boring ties--I want to work on knowing new people instead of saying no to strangers.. I'm hoping this wil push me further into trying new things, thinking new ways and find new avenues for myself.

It's time to say yes

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Something Blue Shouldnt Be Sadness

So me and Johnno have been gearing up to pick a date and a loction for the wedding... It's been really hard to do... And this past week I had a bit of a heartbreak and broke down over the internet

"I just have to complain... So yesterday the wedding planner saw the space that Johnno & I had been really invested in... It's awful in person--she pretty much said it is small dark & would take more than 2 hours to make nice... It wasnt worth our time and money...

I don't even know what to do anymore... I thought it was seriously the space and that we would be good to go... And now its starting all over again

I beginning to seriously regret even wanting a wedding... It's just been so hard & nothing works...."

It's been really miserable to try and plan this wedding at points... Finding a space that is nice and reasonably priced and fits our personalities as turned out to be difficult.. I constantly worry about timeframe and money and whether we can make anyone happy with this--muchless ourselves.

And I know I'm being too hard on myself--and Johnno by default--and I have to let go of this energy. Hopefully this new space I found might work. I need to have something work out....