Monday, September 29, 2014

Inspiration Monday

Phil Donahue

So growing up in the 80s with divorced parents--I spent a lot of time with the TV... It's where I came to love soap operas (RIP Santa Barbara), informericals and "Inside Addition" AKA Bill O'Reilly's trash TV show before his even worst TV show airing now.

But the other thing I watched a lot of was talk shows--Ricki Lake, early Oprah Winfrey, Sarah Jessie Raphael--shows about extreme subjects and celebrity self-promotion. It is where I first saw Joan Collins and feel in love, where I saw families crazier than my own and how my weight struggle wasn't just something I was fighting. And while it wasn't always the best way to learn things--it was an unsentimental education of sorts.

And then there was Donahue--Phil Donahue is the father of the daytime talker in it's purest form. He would debate the issues of the day--whether it was child abuse in the Catholic church, opposing the first Gulf War or the basic issues that came between liberals and conservatives. He had many famous guests on his show--Ralph Nader was a constant guest, Ayn Rand shared her life philosophy as well as various actors, novelists and singers from all over the spectrum. The show was considered the first national platform for hip hop for the majority of mainstream America.

It's hard to pin down one place where Donahue took us to that wasn't something to discuss--whether it was Marilyn Mason in the 90s talking about goth rock, meeting Ryan White and learning about his struggle as a child who contracted AIDS in a era of ignorance, from political figures such as Louis Farrakhan to Bill Clinton, to racism and Holocaust deniers. His show was heartfelt in it's need to understand the world, to share and education through bringing people together. I honestly believe I learned more about the world, different points of view and the importance of interpersonal communication through his show than anywhere else. It's a shame that is show went off the air before his time and he is someone who is missed in this world of tabloid journalism.

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Thursday Truths

Smoke Gets Out of Your Eyes

As of today it has been two weeks since I started the long process of quitting smoking--I know I have tried this before but this time I decided that I needed more help than a patch and half-assed motivation. Since I finally had health insurance, I decided to go the prescription route which scared me at first because of all the possible side effects--and I'm not going to say it has been easy.

It Was This Or Committing Murder At My Office

When they tell you a drug can mess with your emotions-make you more aggressive, sad, or just plain off--they are not screwing around. I spent the first few days on my medication feeling crazy, but still knowing I wasn't crazy, which is the only thing that kept me from going crazy. I guessed that as long as I knew it was the drugs then the over-the-top, melodramatic emotions, and overly pronounced sighs were fine. And for the most part people couldn't even tell the difference even as I kept reminding myself that this wasn't really me but the drugs talking inside of my brain.

It's All An Illusion--So I Got This

Once I got my mood swings in check--seriously is this what PMS is like?--I started to spend a portion of my time meditating and repeating my mantra of "I am a non-smoker, I am a non-smoker". I'm not sure if it is working though I have kind of forgotten about cigarettes which is a good thing because that has always been the hardest thing. But I'm not going to say it has been easy, part of this all revolves around self examination--which I have never really struggled with--but also with self esteem and self worth which are really my worst problem areas but I seem to be doing well--so far.

And I have--because I am sadistic--been spending time exposing myself to my social and emotion triggers when it comes to smoking. I still talk with my co-workers Kenny and Jenna if they are outside smoking post coffee, I have been watching early seasons of "Sex And The City" with all the "Carrie smokes" as well as heading to places where I always smoked like bar patios and parking lots. I hoping that by doing all of this I can train myself to associate these people, places and things with other ideas and thoughts other than cigarettes. It seems the key with successful  quitting is rebranding yourself, reshuffling your brain and reorganizing your actions--all things I feel like I can do with time and a full court press,

I mean if Carrie Bradshaw can quit then so can I--cause that bitch was crazy 

I think--besides you know, quitting--the best thing I can do in this situation is to try and learn some patience, work on how I handle stress and social anxiety, and perhaps put away my need for an escape crutch. I also have to learn to say I'm sorry to the people who are being effected by this change--my moods are sharper and sometimes more cutting which I am not proud of. But if I can do this then it will be something to be truly proud of--a commitment to not only my self but all of those who love me and want to keep me around. I have to realize that is more important than anything else--which is the hardest lesson of all.

Saturday, September 20, 2014

Fashion files

Bougie Doesn't Begin to Describe This

Unless you live under a rock you probably know the new Iphone 6 and IPhone 6 Plus came out this week; I'm not usually too hot on these tech announcements because I barely even use Siri much less every new idea they add to the mix... But for some people this is a huge life changing thing and thus we are gifted with this:

iPhone 6, 6 Plus in your pocket from AppleInsider on Vimeo.

The entire video is just a guy explaining and demonstrating how the new phones fit in each type of pocket compared to not only the 6 and 6 Plus but also the Iphone 5. It's almost too compelling to watch as he goes through the various cuts of pants, jackets and suits to explain the important of the fit--I'm only disappointed that he forgot to do shorts, joggers and harem pants

This is what they mean by first world problems.

Friday, September 19, 2014

Fashion Files: Home Addition

Stir Crazy

I can tell the exact moment I have been too housebound... I start looking through my house for various odds and ends to try and redo the Clubhouse decor... I suddenly go through all the pictures I steal off the web, various piles of my random housewares and debate a total redo... It can be fun and stuff but can also head down the "he is crazy" vibe really quickly. But it is all so pretty...

I mean--the bed room isn't really finished yet and I have never done a ceiling treatment. I mean--it can't be that hard really--the worst thing would to have them land on our sleeping heads,

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

One of My Favorite Things

Pantone Color Day

I know it seems stupid and silly and against my free-natured spirit but I always love Pantone Color Day... What it is is simple--this company announces the "hot" colors for the next season; you'll see these colors in home decor, clothing and makeup rolling into stores through the next year.

Usually I can guess where they are going color-wise ahead of the game--it's only when there is an unexpected shift in fashion like the "normcore" trend that the game gets changed. 

So here is this years colors

I am a huge fan of all three shades even though they are a bit too cool for my taste--I tend more bright blues, oranges and metallics. But they are weirdly early 90s GAP or Calvin Klein which is a happy memory for me so I can go along with it. And honestly I love when pink goes mainstream.

Now off to find pieces in these colors at the thrift and discount stores ahead of the new season!

Monday, September 15, 2014

Moment of Zen

Honestly I just Love These Shoes

They are unrealistic, probably a bit too flashy and yet I think they are just stunning. And they probably would be until the first time I tripped and scuffed them. Then they would look like rejects from a cheap North Hollywood production of the Wiz--which I would be honored to be a part of in all honesty.

But seriously my life is more this:

Though it feels like this:

Though maybe the shoes would change all that? Hmm...

Thursday, September 11, 2014

Thursday Truths

The Struggle is Real

My job after certain point is really just me telling the others what will happen, forewarning possible issues, and I'm usually correct on all fronts. So much so that my nickname is The Reaper since I'm constantly pointing out how to fix problems before they happen.

Essentially I am Cassandra of Greece myth-predicting the future and trying to save this show while everyone else acts like I'm crazy. How I feel is best summed up by the clip from "Scream 2"--which is not something ever said before on the internets.

Honestly the only difference here is that I wouldn't run from the killer but to him--at this point any reason not to work is a sweet release.

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Life Hack

Coffee Nap

I love naps--like really love naps. When I don't get my daily nap I become borderline narcoleptic and tend to either shut down full or become a bitch on wheels. As my former roommates--Edie, Kelly, Valerie, Billie, Candace, Mac, Mrs Garrett, Kaylee, Lola and Johnno--they can all testify to my overwhelming need for sleep

The Struggle Is REAL

I'm not sure when this started to happen--my mother used to say I never napped as a child so I suspect it is part of my current party lifestyle. I mean--9 hour workday, 45 minute workout, coffee/drinks, gaming with the Husbear and then at least one episode of Golden Girls before I attempt to go to bed which usually means reading some Amish Romance on the Kindle. And I gave up caffeine a few years back to help with my eating habits so I don't get that jolt. But I don't drift off to sleep easily before midnight because I'm worried something is going on somewhere without me.

He is Missing Out On Everything

So when there was a recent study comparing coffee versus napping when it came to re-energizing I was interested to see what they came up with. What the study seemed to conclude was that a combination of the two worked best--which seemed a bit weird. But I want to cut back on over-napping and work on a better sleep schedule so what's the harm?

Worst Case Scenario

The study explained a neat trick that worked the two ideas together and maxed out the benefits of each one. It comes down to combination of body chemistry and the organic benefits of coffee. I decided to give it a shot because I wanted to get myself more awake time in the day. I'm debating doing NaNoWriMo again this year-cause I'm a glutton for punishment.

That's Not Realistic-But You Go Girl 

So here's how their plan works:

1) You make a cup of regular coffee--doesn't matter if hot or iced--but it needs to be fresh. They claim that soda or other caffeinated drinks wouldn't work as well with this plan--though I suspect for someone like me who doesn't usually drink that kind of stuff I could use pretty much anything.

I Can Do This In Cup Form Right?

2) You drink the cup one setting as quickly as you can. This is important because the plan hinges on your body's ability to process the drink while you move on to other parts of the process.

Never Apologize For Getting It Done

3) Nap for 20 minutes only-very important. When you drink coffee it takes about 20 minutes for your body to process caffeine into your blood stream--so by timing the drink with the nap you get the best of both without the negative of either. I have tried this a handful of times now and do feel a difference in my energy levels.It's not the most restful nap--probably because I am not used to any caffeine so it hits me harder--but I am definitely ready to go in about 5 minutes after waking up.

This is a victory since I am the world's crankiest person post sleep as Edie, Kelly, Valerie, Billie, Cadance, Mac, Mrs Garrett, Kaylee, Lola and Johnno can testify. I mean it is bad--like a whiny toddler bad--whiny, sleepy, hungry toddler bad.

The Fact I'm Married Still Amazes Me.

Sunday, September 07, 2014

Fashion Files

One Thing Or Another

I'm not a high fashion guy--I like to keep my look casual but interesting by mixing in new styles, cuts and lots of interested and unexpected ideas. Whether it is shoes made with unique fabrics, bright colors in unexpected places or taking things I love like art and books to wear I try to keep it more complicated and love to mix it up.

One of my favorite trends this upcoming fall season plays with the same expectations of fashion--by using unusual fabrics, cuts and styling to create unique pieces of clothing. It's taking the known and mixing it up--formal with sporty, dress-up with casual day wear and high end materials in low end cuts. While some of these ideas have been round for awhile--I think it is these types of pieces that can take the ordinary and bring it to the next level.

Here are some pieces from my own personal closet--as well as new ideas hitting stores already for this fall.

Pony Boy Prep

I scored these last season--these seem like just your run-of-the-mill dark boat shoes but what you can't tell is that they are made of a dark brown pony skin. (My phone sucks--oops.) It takes the simple summer shoe and brings it to a whole new level of luxury and I always get comments on them. It's because when it comes to preppy--some times you can have a glamorous edge.

Brogue Boots from River

I know there has been a trend for a while now with the brogue shoe being updated--whether turned into sneakers, slip-ons and now boots. It's that perfect piece of 20/30/40's flair that brings to mind flappers, Gatsby and decadence. But while the original shoes are a bit too stiff and formal for everyday wear, these half-breads offer a comfortable and stylish comprise. Great with colored khakis at work or with perfectly cuffed jeans when on the town.

Seth Cohen Realness

So this is from my personal collection--and looks like a simple short sleeved black t-shirt--which it is. But this is a knitted t-shirt, a light weight, short sleeved yet warm top to wear during those day into night social engagements like brunch by the sea in the morning and cocktails at night in the mountains. And because the sweater shirt is so thin I can recreate the layered look of the early 2000s by wearing this over long-sleeved buttons like Adam Brody did during his "O.C." days. Stylish and multi-purpose.

A tailored bomber by

This is one of my favorites--taking the simple bomber jacket style that has been done to death with sports wear and cheap hoodie fabric--and using high-end tweed as the material. It says I'm causal and sporty but still have an American Express black card for dinner and shopping after we watch the football game. I love this because it would look great layered with a tie and button-down look or a simple classic t-shirt and cords. Perfect.

Sweatshirt Comfort and Rocker Style

This is probably one of my favorite finds of the fall season. In California it rarely gets cold enough for a proper leather jacket--though you wouldn't know that from my closet--so I love to find great light weight coats that look more detail than the average hoodie or cardigan. This piece is as warm as a sweatshirt but has the look of an edgy leather jacket--good for work with the right pants and ready to spend the night at the local arcade.

Denim Joggers by Urban

These are probably the most controversial of my picks for this trend but I fell in love with the look and fit of joggers over this past spring and summer. They're loose through the leg but still come in at the feet but without that tapered jean look that can be really unflattering--comfort while still being able to show off your new kicks. While you do run the risk of looking like a DJ Tanner from "Full House" if worn the wrong way, it's a good way to try the jogger look without getting to sweatpant-ed or overly graphic in the design.

So that's it--my picks for some of the best uses of unlikely materials and cuts. Of course there is a million more out there--but I can't be window shopping all the time. (Though tell my husband that-SERIOUSLY.)

PS: As always--these are just my views and my picks, there was no money made off of any of my suggests. If you would like to know where I found my personal pieces--comment down below and I'll fill you in.

Friday, September 05, 2014

Friday Jams

Happy Music Happy People

It's finally Friday--and nothing is more exciting that a Friday after a three day weekend because you're just so tired even if it was only a 4 day work week... So to celebrate--here's one of my favorite happy music/happy Rory songs for your own office dance party.

Mr. Blue Sky by ELO because it makes me bounce

Thursday, September 04, 2014

Thursday Truths

Why Yes--That Is Me

There's been a lot of talk recently about nude selfies become some type of target for hackers--whether it is celebrities like Jennifer Lawrence, politicians like Anthony Weiner (huh) and athletes like George Burgess--the question has come who is to blame? There are some who blame these victims for taking the pictures in the first place--it's similar to the argument of "you dressed like you wanted the attention". For others, the feeling is that these type of incidents can be like crimes--if the pictures were taken from someone's personal account instead of randomly texted out to people then it is akin to stealing.

I cannot wait for "Law & Order: Nude Selfies Theft Unit.

If you ask me--I don't get what the public outcry is all about. I know a lot of people who have taken nude pictures--maybe not full body shots or in explicit XXX poses--but it's something that has become much more common in this day of camera phones, app dating and general open door sexuality. If anything, I think we should come to expect that everyone has a nude picture somewhere.

In full disclosure I have more than a handful of nude pictures out there, some taken when I was single for all the dating apps and matching making websites, some from flirty texts with the husband and at least one or two bad ideas. I used to get worked up and concerned about who would see these pictures but after one or two incidents I had to learn the big lesson--which is one you put anything out in the ether that is the internet you have to learn to let it go. To realize that anything you allow out of your own personal devices whether phone or computer and on to anything web based whether it is OK Cupid, the iCloud, Facebook or even IMDB will pretty much always be there--so you have to learn to shrug and own it.

That said--it's not always easy. The first time I was told about someone stumbling across my nudes I didn't take it well. it was from someone who I didn't expect and was told to me in a public place one on one. I was mortified beyond belief and took it pretty hard especially becomes this wasnt even a person I knew very well.

Oh Look--it's a closet and a case--for CDs.

It didn't even occur to me until later to question why this person had seen my photos--and like in most cases--the only way you will usually see something like that is if you were looking for nudes for your own personal reasons. This means you were probably in some uncomfortable position yourself Mr. Shame Game.

Um--no desert for me

I have since come to see the nude selfie as something actually quite empowering--you take and keep those pictures because you find yourself in that moment attractive enough to deserve to be captured and shared. There is something very pro-body image, pro-sexuality and pro-self that comes into play in the scenario that I think is great. And when it comes to sending those pictures to someone you are involved with--if only for the night--it also signals a sense of trust in the relationship that is great even if it is some times misplaced. We live in a culture that either overly champions sex as a game or overly shames people when it comes to sexuality--I think as we grow as a society and it becomes more common to be more open on the net it will led to more ownership of self.

Unless you have your pictures stolen from your device then fuck off thieves.


Tuesday, September 02, 2014


I really want this love seat. Like obsessed with it. It would be prefect in the Clubhouse.

Life Hacks

It's Like 52 Pick Up-But Backwards With Money

So I have always had a hard time figuring out the best way to save money-I always get so worried about needing flexability in my finances that I would sent really high goals and not be able to meet them. In wasn't until I was exposed to this neat trick by the husbear Johnno that I would something that works. It's based off the weeks of the year and is super easy once you commit.

Plus It Makes Me Feel Like This

What it is is simple--working backwards you put away a set amount of cash based on the week of the year. The first Friday is 52 dollars, next is 51 dollars and so on... The really nifty thing about this is that by the time you reach the holiday season--you're only putting away a few dollars at a time so you still have a budget for things like gifts, holiday meals and Christmas film viewings...

It has worked well for me the last few years and helped me put away some nice amount of safety money. It's not going to buy me a house but gives a great cushion for unexpected rainy days. Anyone can do it because it is really motivating to see the amount goes down as your savings goes up. But if you asked me how much it adds up to? That I don't know off the top of my head.

Truer Words Were Never Spoken

Monday, September 01, 2014

Monday Inspiration

Twin Peaks Re-view

Every summer there's that moment when you realize there is nothing new to watch and you're only choices are reality shows or bad pilots--Johnno and I try to use this time to rediscover or find new shows to fill the void. He'd never seen TP all the way through and I hadn't seen it in years so I figured it was a good fit.

Who Doesn't Love a Beautiful Corpse?

It's interesting to watch the show with a virgin--you forget how when you remove all the overly weird things from the show--it really is a show about one basic emotion. Grief. Every character in some way is responding to the death of Laura Palmer--some are obvious like her parents but others like her friends and classmates have much odder and deeper feelings. You are being shown through the first half of the show the power of death, how haunting it becomes--not just the pure shock from the murder aspect but the same little waves that ripple from any death.

In a way-because it is grief that runs the show on so many levels-it makes sense that show doesn't really survive once Laura's death is solved and understood. While David Lynch uses his sense of visual style and twisted dialogue to create a noir heavy universe that is fun, without the very human, very naked emotions that run below the surface the show becomes just a bunch of weird and clever puppets running around.

That said--watching the show is inspires me on so many levels. There is a level of plotting at play that is like a juggling act between the overall story of Laura's death, the various love triangles, drug plots and criminal mischief throughout the town. There are the many unique and strange details that Lynch focuses on--the logging mill, the track housing, the weird mix of 90s and 50s found in the sets, music and costumes. You don't know what you are watching or where it is going but you are pulled in by your eyes, eyeballs and eventually your heart and mind. Even the theme song creates such a strong reaction within me.

Creepy Creepy Creepy

There is something so stirring within just the opening, something that few shows can do with a full episode much less a full minute. I think that is what I take most of all from the show, that while it seems to use obvious tricks, it's a show about layers and emotions that lie beneath.

Well--until it gets super weird.