I haven't been able to sit down for two extra seconds as of late. I have been feeling overwhlemed with all of this stress and it is getting in the way of me getting a lot of things done.
Now normal i am not the type to get all worked up over-well-work. I can usually turn it on and off--I can be all business and driven and good at what i do and be even better when i leave it all behind at the end of the day. the problem has been how long this job has been lasting-we're already a month over schedule.
Normal this wouldn't even give me pause because more work means less hustling for the freelancer worker. It's just that I am not also commited to return to Big Brother for the summer and if things play out the way they have i will not get any break between the two shows. And Big Brother is the type of show that takes over your life and I would like to plan my life out before it gets taken away from me
And add to this the reality of the current show--that one by one all the guys in my department are leaving for otyher shows and possibly leaving me with the bulk of the work. I'm annoyed because I know that there is a very strong chance I will not be able to finish out the show on my own--and I feel very put upon by a work load that is unrealistic.
And added to that is the fact that EP of teh show keeps offering me a chance to a handful of better things for the show--things that would be a huge boon to my resume but almost impossible to do if I am left to finish up handling the footage and tie up all the loose ends for the deaprtment.
So I feel like I have no control--there is a chance I will have to carry a huge weight of finishing up one part of the show while being fored to turn down a chance to do something even more exciting and with a possible title. I have made it known at the office my worries but I know there is only so much they can do. Add to this--I have jury duty in a week.
That is what they call a hat trick.
And so it is likely I will be at one show up until the next show starts with no break. And since BB's work schedule can be crazy and led to me not being around much during the summer-I just feel like all my free time and choices are running out. i hate it.
And that is teh current recipe for stress.