St. Patrick Really Does get Rid of Snakes

Time of death--12:09 this past Saturday night. The moment when I realized that I am over Nick. Not kind of over or tricking myself into thinking it's over or wanting it to be over so I start repeating the phrase like some type of secert mantra till I believe it.

Nope-truly over. I'm not really sure how it came about--whether it was the half hour talk about LA real estate prices or when one has to buckle down and start investing in the future. Maybe it was serious talk about wanting kids tomorrow more than today.

Or maybe it was the goofy polo under the ass ugly sweatshirt.

Regardless of how I got there--I am free. I still like Nick as friendd, would love to go out with dinner with him once or twice a month, hang out and help him met guys. But I am free of all the other stuff.

I am free of this idea that one day he would just want me--from this selfish thought that I would be the best thing he could ever have--that just because we have so much in common doesn't mean anything at all.

We can both do better. I see that now and it rocks my fucking world.