Selling Your Self Hot?
Episode Three

So I have been slowly making steps and plans to getting back into the dating scene. I’ve been going out to bars and getting used to being around guys again—though I have yet to dance with myself much less anyone else. But everything is a process and it’s about the steps so I feel like I’m doing fine thus far.

That being said, I’ve also been trying to get myself datable in other ways. I’ve been slowly going back into working out—a combination of kickboxing DV for a half an hour three times a week and starting to run two other nights a week. It’s been a bit hard since I have not been running for awhile but I have been surprised but how much I am loving it again. Add to that me cutting back on smoking and working on a better diet with a lot more veggies and less dairy and its looking good if hard sometimes.

The next big step has been pulling together personal ads with various on-line sites. I like on-line sites because it’s like being constantly dressed up and with a witty if earnest introduction of sorts. But it’s always hard to pull an ad together; to try and figure out the best of your self while being honest and truthful.

And it’s not just the weight/height/age stuff which can be a bit hard to put to paper but trying to figure out how to best explain your personality. You start to question every word you use and every option you’re giving. Am I sincere? Charming? Adventurous? Would my friends say the same thing? Should I have them write the ad for me?

And then you have to talk about what you like and are into without being trite or too common. Everyone likes walks on the beach and cuddling and slow dancing so you have to really sit down and think about how you are and what makes you a good catch. Should I mention that I like to do interior design or is that too gay? With sports information can I check off the hockey box even though I just like to go and watch it? It’s rather hard to do.

Then once you feel like you have nailed yourself (Looks, personality, interests) down to a paragraph or two it comes time to try narrow down what you are looking for. A list is like that is hard—beyond trying to be open and not shallow in the looks department—because it’s hard to know what creates romantic possibility, not even thinking about a long term relationship might entail from a partner.

Do I want someone who speaks his mind? Should I close myself off to divorced men? Men with kids? Men who work part time or are still in school? Do I want someone who is spontaneous? Someone who is driven? Likes to travel or stay home? Needles to say it’s been a rather daunting process.

This doesn’t even include how to pick the right picture that makes me datable and yet still looks like me. Which is very hard in this day of the myspace angle.