Okay...sorry it has been awhile since I wrote but all the time has brought much more interesting things for me to write about... First of all.... I am sick and have been since last Thursday... And we're not talking run of the mill, grab-some-hankies-and-some-nyquil-and-stop-bitching-sick but the whole-go-to-the-doctor-after-looking-up-symptoms-on-the-internet-sick... Of course, the only funny thing about the entire sernario is that I don't get sick often but when I do, it is bad... (I have only been sick once in LA....that required anything like drugs or sleep..)

I will be honest and say that I am terrified... That what had started as a simple fever with nothing else going on...it was taken huge steps towards becoming big and nasty and I am scared of it.... I am doing my guy thing by not making the next step....because I feel slightly better though the major symptons haven't gone away and the longer I wait to see a doctor....the worse the possible treatment... (we taking surgery.....) And the best of all of this is why I am not being active.... Frankly, I am more scared of the debt I will occure if this is the big baddie it seems then of the actual sickness....

And this is crazy...it is because I have no health care, no benefits and even in my best jobs.... Th benefits were either so expensive compared to the coverage you got or so restricted.....interms of wHAt you were allowed to be covered for.... And this has started me thinking about there is a huge number of people out there with no medical insurance, people my age, friends of mine.. Just going about and living their lives and , on some level, hoping and praying that they don't get sick, or in an accident, or need anything major from a doctor.... And there are most likely people like me, who know their sick, that something is wrong, but don't go to the doctor because they are scared of how are they going to pay? Especially when it is so expensive for certain things.... And they let things go till finally something has got to give.... And it is usually their health.....

Not that I am going to do that.... Nope... NOt me....