Balancing Boys

So I have been trying to be a lot more proactive than normal as of late. There’s no reason for any major push forward on the dating front but I have just decided to just get things rolling and see where I can take myself. I’m sure it had to do with the upswing in reactions to my dating profiles but whatever the reason I felt the need to get out there more.

Which has led me to an interesting position—of having a bit more attention than I am used to and being uncertain as how to handle it. This is not meant to be bragging but just some musings on where my head is like when it comes to men.

The first guy I started emailing with was Judd. Now Judd was a guy who had tried to start something up back in May but between work and weddings and everything else I was kind of not responsive. I wasn’t meaning to blow him off but I kind of did so I was surprised that he was still following my page views and profile updates so religiously. And then when I emailed him that I couldn’t be counted on for much in the near future he was all kind of like ‘I can wait as long as you need me to’ which would be flattering if we had ever had some serious talks but nothing. I just get an odd vibe.

Then there is Noah. Noah was a profile I randomly stumbled across that just seemed to stick out and so I figured I would send a flirt or two. He responded right away and we started a nice run of flirty yet not too flirty emails that covered a lot of ground. It wasn’t until an innocent exchange of answers that I got weirded out.

He had asked what one on my favorite passages was in an book and I used the opening lines of ‘Anna Karenina’ which was ‘Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way’ and I described how I felt that it really illustrated how people find more creative value in unhappiness then happiness. The response I received was a dissertation on love and misery and how you had to have both in order to have a real relationship. It was a bit jarring to realize that one) this guy seemed to be implying that you need strum and drag for a relationship as well as two) that he was already throwing around the love word.

Then there is Robert. Now he emailed me out of the blue with a very direct email about how he felt he and I should become friends and starting chatting ASAP. At first he didn’t have a profile I could read (which means usually I won’t respond) but after I requested one he complied. I read his profile and I was confused—everything he was and wanted was nothing at al like me. He wears Brooks Brothers and considers himself to have a slight sense of humor and is not very emotional. I wrote him back and said that I was probably not his type—without being too exact I just basically said I was too Bohemian and shallow for his taste and I was not sure what he thought would come out of it. He responded that I was the first person to not give him more of a shot.

And finally there is Colin. Now Colin is a profile I have run into many times but have never tried to contract. He is very cute and seems like exactly my type but also seemed a bit out of my league so I just never bothered. Then I ran into his profile in a random way and decided to give it a shot and he seems eager but flighty. So I don’t know what to think but our few emails have been light and breezy which is a good sign.

And so now I am confused. Do I blow off the two that seem really into me but might be totally wrong even though I always argue that you should give everyone one date before writing them off? Do I just focus on the one that seems like the best match? And what do I do about the one who seems too into me—trust my gut and just walk or let it lay out?

These are times when I wish I had a headwriter for my life.