Thursday Truths

Sometimes You Have to Let Go

I've never been good at letting go, relaxing in the moment or waiting on things to just happen. I suspect part of this was just from my being an ambitious child, part of from parents who were a bit too distracted and the overwhelming grasp of the me generation I grew up in. But I have always had a hard time putting things down and waiting for them to settle.

                       Seriously I am playing this game constantly--even when it tells me to wait

So when I hear about people taking vacations--I'm always thrown by the idea. My best friend Kelly goes to Maine for weeks in the summer, my boss Roland takes ten days with his family to the east--I have even had editors flee for days on end to places like Ireland and Missouri. I just don't get how they do it--how they can put their careers, friends and life on hold to go off the grid.

And maybe part of this is that I have always worked some kind of freelance as an adult--whether it was scourging for hours when I worked retail even as a assistant manager or because I have jumped from TV show to show back when I had a more flexible career. But the idea of not working means not making money means no longer term trips to exotic places because how will bills get paid?

               For Some Reason This Came Up When I Searched Images of Cairo--Huh?

This doesn't mean I don't travel out of town--I go to Seattle or San Francisco or Las Vegas on the regular--I can pull myself together for trips to Vancouver or Chicago for weddings and family visits. But I always cut the travel close to leave at last moment on a Friday and back at work on a Monday. I only took 3 days off for my wedding and part of that was because we got married on a Friday night to save money and let our guests have a full weekend to explore a new city... While other people get to explore the museums and tourist traps I'm lucky if I get beyond my hotel room and a handful of restaurants.

But what I have come to learn lately is that there is no point to doing things this way--my financial life will not fall apart if we have a honeymoon or take a week to see another city. That as an adult who works hard and makes decent money I should be able to plan and take advantage of such an experience-that I know the few trips I had where I was able to relax meant the world to me. That there is so much to be gained from leaving the familiar and putting the everyday on hold--even if it is letting myself take a full four day weekend instead of rushing in and out of trip. That when I do this I am able to recharge and reboot and makes my job, my writing, friendships and my marriage better.