This Life Is Out Of Service

So I have fallen apart a bit in the last week. Not emotionally but more in terms of schedule and doing the things I want to do versus need to do. I made it into month 2 of P90X and proceeded to fall off the schedule. I didn't just stop but I had to miss a day or two which made me feel crazy guilty which then made me double on workouts which made me super sore and tired which made the next day harder.

I am my own worst enemy sometimes.

Add to the mix an internal debate... I am trying to figure out if and what i should do about NaNoWriMo this year. There is a novel that I have that I need to rewrite that Johnno has been transcribing for me from the last hard copy I had before my computer crash back in 2005. It is not the same novel as my first NaNoWriMo so it doesnt feel like full out cheating but still... I like to play by the rules which insist on new work each time.

Its not like I even have an idea or a plot to do but I just feel like I don't want to cheat. This makes me crazy of course--no one will know or care besides me so I can do what I want. But work has been crazy too so will I want to sit back down at a computer and write after a 9 hour day? Only if work gets better.

But the most important part is this--if I do p90x and NaNoWriMo I will have no life at all outside of these projects. Both mean the world to me in different ways and both would benefit me immensely but would they drive me crazy if combined? That is the part I am not sure about.

But it would save me money from not going out as much. A benefit to be considered.