You Might Be Becoming A Lesbian

I had this thought the other night as I was rolling around my house post work and post red wine-I might just be finding the ladies more fun than the mens.

I am in love with the film “Whip It’ even thought it is all about hidden girl on girl sexuality. I find myself constantly curious about Drew Barrymore and Juliette Lewis-what would they be like in bed? I’d watch.




I like the idea of going to Lilith Fair and possibly following said tour around in some type of VW bus. I was depressed I couldn’t get on the action last go around. This even though most of the acts would want to cut my penis off-looking at you Paula Cole and Alanis Morisette.



Even still, I have been obsessed with the entire ‘The Runways’ catalog lately and blasting various tunes whenever in the shower to the ire of my neighbors. Kristin Stewart’s portrayal of Joan Jett and her lady loving ways made like that actress and we all know I think she sucks.



And now I just want to hang out with my lesbian friends. I spend my days at work with Jolisa and we hide in her bay as she talks about all the girls she kissed the weekend before. I have learned how to undone a bra by snapping my fingers. And at night-I find myself constantly trying to get together with Kirby, Wynona-as well as Johnno’s friends Jamie-Lynn and Justine because they know how to drink and get the party going well beyond the tipping point. Beer and babes abound and I love it.

I love it so much that I want to turn other girls lesbian so they can be just as cool. Some of you better watch your back!

You know who you are